SNES, Reviews

Yoshi’s Cookie (SNES) – Conveyor-Belt Carnage, Industrial Baking, and the Snack-Sized Puzzle That Refused to Crumble

Picture Mario in a sanitary hairnet, Yoshi gulping pastries like a green Kirby at a bake-off, and an assembly line of checkerboards, donuts, and heart-shaped biscuits sliding toward oblivion while Sousa-inspired snares rattle your speakers. Sound like a hallucination brought on by too many midnight Chips Ahoy? Welcome to Yoshi’s Cookie, the Super Nintendo puzzler […]

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SNES, Reviews

Final Fantasy IV (SNES) – Moon Whales, Spoony Bards, and the Stopwatch that Rewired JRPGs

How many RPGs open by asking you to burn down a helpless village, only to hand you the keys to a flying whale and hurl you at the literal surface of the Moon before the sixty-minute mark? Not many, and that is why Final Fantasy IV, never mind the confusing “II” on my childhood cartridge,

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Reviews, SNES

Yoshi’s Safari (SNES) – Mario, a Bazooka, and the Greatest Battery Hog in Dinosaur History

Picture your first glimpse of Mario in 1993: not side-scrolling, not kart-racing, not even teaching typing, but perched on Yoshi’s saddle brandishing a two-foot plastic cannon that ate six AA batteries before lunch. Absurd? Totally. Underrated? Absolutely. Fundamental? More than you think. Yoshi’s Safari is the SNES rail shooter everybody forgot to invite to the

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Reviews, SNES

Super Bomberman 2 (SNES) – Why 1111 Is the Funniest Number in Password History

Picture it: the very first thing your heroic White Bomber does is get snatched, vacuum-tube style, into a fluted beaker that looks ordered from Villainous Laboratories Quarterly. Scientific accuracy? Zero. Dramatic effect? One hundred. Logical sense? Do we even want that in a Bomberman? (Exactly.) Super Bomberman 2 is a cartridge that begins by imprisoning its protagonist

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